SHELLEY WASHINGTON

“I didn’t know how to be anything else but strong. I wasn’t taught another way.”

Shelley grew up believing strength was simply how life worked. Grief came, responsibility followed, and she kept doing what needed to be done because she had never been shown another way. It took years to realize that being dependable had become so automatic, she no longer knew what it felt like to just be Shelley.

EMELY RUMBLE

“People can’t hear my pain because all they see is my shine. People can’t hear my frustration because they see my privilege, my favor.”

Emely lost the grandmother who raised her at 14 and learned early that strength meant figuring life out without much of a safety net. Foster care, emancipation, school, work, adulthood, she kept moving. Years later, she began asking what it had cost to always be the one who could handle it.

ACHEA REDD

“I have always been the one wrapping my arms around people, but there’s nobody there to wrap their arms around me.”

Achea learned to become the emotional caretaker before she was old enough to understand what that meant. She spent years watching for what might go wrong and stepping in before anyone else had to. Eventually, she had to ask a question she had rarely made room for: who takes care of me?

DR. FROSWA’ BOOKER-DREW

“There are versions of ourselves that worked at a time to protect us, that we continue to use that no longer serve us.”

Dr. Froswa’ learned early that being responsible was simply what was expected of her. Over time, strength became overfunctioning, pushing through, and holding together what was costing her peace. Years later, she began questioning whether the version of herself that once protected her still deserved to run her life.

CYNTHIA STRICKLAND

“I want to be in rooms not built for me, but I don’t want to be a burden in the room. That’s the conditioning that came with it.”

Cynthia spent years being the first, the only, and the one expected to hold everything together in rooms never really built with her in mind. She learned how to keep performing while feeling unseen. Eventually, she had to ask what it had cost to keep proving she belonged.

JUANITA INGRAM

“If you remove your humanity from yourself, other people will willingly do it too. Don’t do that to yourself.”

Juanita had done everything she was supposed to do, earned the degrees, built the career, worked hard, and learned how to excel. But when fear and vulnerability showed up, she saw how quickly competence could make people overlook her humanity.

JOYEL CRAWFORD

“I had been everything to everybody. I literally found myself crying up to the heavens asking God, Why am I so miserable?”

Joyel spent years proving she could handle whatever was asked of her, until work became something she measured herself by. Even after leaving corporate America, the pattern followed her. Eventually, she had to confront how much of her worth had become tied to productivity.

FAWN WALKER MONTGOMERY

“If I die today, they’ll be like, Fawn was really committed to the movement for Black liberation. She was a good advocate and that’s it.”

Fawn spent years fighting for her community while pushing through pain in her own body. Endometriosis, dismissal, surgery, and years of being needed forced her to ask a harder question, who was she when she was no longer defined by what she could do for everyone else?

SADIJA A. SMILEY

“I can’t do this. I physically couldn’t do it mentally. I just went until my mind, my body and my soul was like, nah sis, you can’t.”

Sadija spent years being the one who handled everything, especially in motherhood. She kept moving until a panic attack in an emergency room parking lot made the cost impossible to ignore. That was the moment she realized strength had taken her too far from herself.

DIDI HAIRSTON

“Strong is not a compliment. It’s a curse word for us because it’s a word that has been used to brush off our feelings, our illnesses, our weaknesses.”

Didi spent years pushing through depression, motherhood, work, and a harmful relationship while still being expected to function. Eventually, her mind and body gave out. Being called strong did not lessen the pain, it made it easier for people to miss how much she was struggling.

KIMBERLY SUMPTER

“I realized how battered and bruised and beat up I had been over the years. We just continue to move forward.”

Kimberly spent years putting work, responsibility, and other people ahead of herself without noticing what it was costing her. Then a health scare forced her to see how far she had pushed past her own needs. Now she’s learning to choose rest and stop waiting for permission to step away. 

RADIAH SHABAAZ-HAROLD

“Can somebody really just see me? Can I fully be witnessed outside of what I’m providing or doing for somebody?”

Radiah spent years being known as the one who could figure things out, while living with chronic illness, motherhood, work, and the pressure to keep performing at full capacity. By 2025, the pushing had taken a toll on her mental and physical health. What she wanted most was not another reminder that she could handle it, but to be seen before everything fell apart.

DR. CANDICE DAWSON

“I just want to be able to say the thing. And when I share the thing, I want you to respect that I shared the thing.”

Dr. Candice spent years being the one who could figure it out, for her children, her parents, and everyone who depended on her. Eventually, managing everybody else’s needs while trying to keep up with her own left her exhausted. Now she is learning to set harder boundaries, choose rest, and let saying “this is too much” be enough.