Being the strong one in rooms that were never built for you often comes at a cost, especially when you’ve learned to keep going no matter what it takes.
This episode is story two of the 26 Black Women Storytelling Series, where Black women share what being strong has cost them, and the kind of support that could have made a difference.
In this conversation, Cynthia “Cyn” Strickland shares what it cost to be the one holding it all together in spaces where she was often the only one who looked like her.
For Cynthia, being the strong one in rooms not built for her wasn’t just about work, it shaped how she showed up in every part of her life.
Cynthia has spent decades building a career across technology, consulting, and leadership, showing up, delivering, and proving herself in rooms that were not designed with her in mind.
But behind the success was a pattern of pushing through, compartmentalizing, and moving on without ever stopping to process what she had been through.
From navigating serious health moments alone, to having her work taken and handed to someone else, to realizing she was being valued for what she could produce but not seen as a full person, this conversation explores what it means to lose your voice while appearing successful.
We talk about workplace pressure, identity, and the emotional cost of always being the one who can handle it. This is what being the strong one in rooms not built for you can look like when it goes unspoken for too long.
This episode is also a reminder that just because you’ve learned how to navigate hard spaces doesn’t mean you were ever meant to carry them alone.
And sometimes the real shift begins when you allow yourself to be seen beyond what you do.
Cynthia’s story reflects a deep need for Mindful Care – the kind of support that checks in, follows up, and creates space for you to be honest about what’s really going on.
If you’ve ever felt like you had to prove yourself in every room, or like your value was tied to what you could produce, this conversation will stay with you.
If you found yourself listening and thinking, “this is me,” but you’re not sure what support would even look like, the Support Languages™ assessment can help you start to put language to that: shadesofstrong.com/supportlanguages.
About Cynthia Strickland
Cynthia “Cyn” Strickland is a writer, strategist, and entrepreneur who works with high-achieving professionals, especially Black women and LGBTQ+ leaders, who are starting to question the lives and careers they’ve built.
Before this chapter of her life, Cynthia spent years navigating spaces where she was often the only one who looked like her, building a career across technology, consulting, and leadership.
Over time, she began to notice what constantly holding everything together was asking of her.
In 2024, after years of monitoring, biopsies, and a lumpectomy, Cynthia underwent a double mastectomy followed by radiation treatment. That experience shifted how she thinks about time, work, and what it really means to take care of herself.
Now, through her writing and the work she does with others, Cynthia creates space for people to rethink success, tell the truth about what they’ve been carrying, and choose a different way forward.
Connect with Cynthia Strickland
Instagram | LinkedIn | Substack
About Shades of Strong®
Shades of Strong® is a space where Black women come to breathe, reflect, and reclaim strength without the struggle. Support Pauses are short, soulful reminders that you don’t have to carry it all alone. New episodes drop every weekday.
Resources to Support You:
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Let’s Stay Connected:
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Shirl Hubbard is the creator of Support Languages™ and host of Shades of Strong® — a movement shifting the narrative from Strong Black Woman to Supported Black Woman™ through language, rest, and real support.
Excellent Podcast! As the sister of Cynthia Cyn Strickland, I can say that hearing her tell her story was special. She was not exaggerating when she said she is an introvert. Her unfortunate experience with Breast Cancer has brought out another side of her, which along with making her tougher, may be the only positive to come out of it.
Thank you so much for listening and for sharing this. Hearing that from someone who knows her in real life means more than you know. I’m really glad her story was held in a way that felt true.
CMS, very interesting and well said. I learned a lot about you, some surprises and not surprising. I’m glad you’re writing a book, because you have a lot of knowledge to pass on to others. I really enjoyed the podcast, and give credit to the host, she asked all the right questions to bring out the best of you, I could tell you were really comfortable!
Excellent!
I really appreciate you saying that. Creating a space where women feel comfortable enough to tell the truth matters to me, so this means a lot. Thank you for listening.