We Love Our Black Men — Sometimes to Our Own Detriment
When we’re newly coupled up, everything looks like pink tulips and butterflies — we spend our days daydreaming about him and the relationship through a pair of proverbial rose-colored glasses.
But as soon as the newness wears off, ish gets real and everything in us is SCREAMING…
But for whatever reason, we find ourselves stuck justifying why we stay and why we continue to accept the behavior that we’re reluctant to call abuse.
Those on the outside looking in could easily say that being “trapped” in a relationship is a state of mind, because surely no one needs consent to leave a relationship, right?
Natty and I beg to differ. There are countless women walking the face of the earth everyday going through their daily routines laughing and smiling, while being STUCK in unhealthy relationships that range from alienation of affection to literally fighting to stay alive.
The reasons for staying vary from one woman to the next,
but in this episode we cover the
TOP FIVE REASONS
why we often find ourselves trapped in unhealthy relationships.
In no particular order those reasons are as follows:
1. Our PERCEPTION of what constitutes abuse.
2. LOYALTY– as Black people, we don’t always feel comfortable surrendering “our own” to the treatment of a racially biased police state and as women, we don’t always feel safe calling police officers who may harm us instead of helping us. AND when we do speak out or seek help, we too often experience backlash from members of our own communities who believe we are airing out dirty laundry and making ourselves look bad in front of white people.
3. SPIRITUAL BELIEFS — we are more likely to rely on religious guidance and faith-based practices – Religious beliefs often discourage divorce, instead encourage forgiveness and often condemns those who dare to get out.
4. Our attempts to embody the “STRONG BLACK WOMAN” STEREOTYPE– how we see ourselves
5. SAVING FACE – guilt, shame and fear
This episode is for every black woman who has been guilted into silence, for every black woman who’s looking for a way out and for every black woman who finally got the courage to take her life back from the unhealthy relationship that stole it from her.
YOU, MY BEAUTIFUL BLACK QUEENS
ARE THE G.O.A.T!
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