OOO WEE!! I don’t know if y’all ready for this one. There will probably be some pearl clutching going on, so brace yourselves because it’s about to get real.
So, errm can we talk about emotional pain and Christianity for a minute? My mom has had three surgeries in a two-year time span – never completely healing physically, spiritually or emotionally before another surgery was scheduled.
Needless to say, her body was was experiencing EXTREME discomfort and there were days when she questioned everything about her existence AND the existence of the Higher Power, we call God.
She couldn’t understand why this God she had been worshiping like her life depended on it was punishing her. Did that make her any less of a Christian?
But someone had the audacity to question her relationship with God because he happened to catch her on a day when she was experiencing severe emotional pain.
He yelled at my mom and pretty much told her that she was feeling the way she was feeling because she was choosing to feel that way – that she could and SHOULD choose to be happy.
You’re a Christian.
You KNOW God is a healer.
You’re STRONGER than that. Snap out of it!
BRO!!!!! First of all, don’t be yelling at my mom! We don’t do that here!
Second of all, what you NOT gon do is act like my mom ain’t SAVED because she’s holding space for the emotional pain she’s experiencing.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I DO believe that happiness is a choice in some instances.
But, let’s be real. Sometimes life hits you hard and there’s simply no choosing or deciding your way out of it!
It hurts! And that pain is real!
The sadness is real. The bitterness, the anger, the regret- it’s all VERY real.
So, although my mom is a firm believer that the healing power of God is real, she DID NOT need to hear that when she was having a moment…
….and it was not a moment of weakness. It was actually a very powerful moment of strength.
It takes strength to and courage to admit that you’re not okay– especially when those around you frown on not being okay.
My mom’s not accustomed to having to depend on anyone for anything. Now suddenly (for over a year) she’s barely able to do anything for herself.
Can you imagine the emotional toll that took on her.
…and don’t act like you’ve never been there.
We all have. Sometimes life literally knocks us off our feet, and even if you’re a devout follower of Christ, you’ll find yourself questioning everything you hold to be true.
And guess what? That’s okay.
…because contrary to what some would have you to believe, Christianity and emotional pain CAN co-exist.
You don’t have to keep your pain neatly tucked away because you’re a Christian. Cry, fall apart, waddle.. do whatever you need to do to get through it, and DON’T YOU DARE APOLOGIZE for any of it!
And if you find yourself on the other side where your friend or love one is experiencing mental or emotional trauma, don’t beat her up. Hold space for her. Give her room to experience her humanness.
So tell me, sis. What’s you story? Have you been in a similar situation? How’d you handle it?
Sound off in the comments. I’d love to hear from you. If commenting is not your thing, shoot me an email email@example.com.
Need more conversations about ALL THE THINGS that shape, make and
sometimes break the Strong Black Woman? Listen to podcast episodes HERE